Before I dive into this topic, I want to acknowledge the lapse in a steady release of fresh self-esteem building content. It is not because I have said all that I have wanted to – definitely not! It is just that I am currently taking two life coaching certification programs and I cannot fully dedicate myself to multiple things at once. I’ve also been fairly quiet on social media and I tend to do this when I’m hard at work! However, a recent connection I made inspired this post and I’ve been really eager to get it out in print.
As I have moved forward with learning about coaching and continuing to coach myself through my emotions and thought processes, I realized that I have carried a specific belief system around with me my entire adulthood. I was carrying it into my present, allowing it to come out randomly and upset me. This belief system – in essence, that my following a passion will be too hard and that I don’t have what it takes emotionally or intellectually to make it happen – has a very specific (and fucking terrible) dialog:
“I’m not smart enough to create my own business.”
“I’m not smart enough to do anything different.”
“Maybe I’m just meant to support others and stay where I am…watch others succeed while I stay stagnant.”
What does being a neurodivergent person have to do with any of this? My brain works differently and it forges unique connections. I feel like it is a super-power at this point because I see obstacles from varying angles and I can, if I may say so, come up with some pretty creative solutions for problems and can reveal where understanding and empathy may be needed. I am a creative and idea-driven person; however, this quality wasn’t always well-received by others…sometimes even people that I loved. There are instances where my perspectives did not line up with another’s and I would be mocked or scoffed at…as if I was not intelligent enough to grasp the topic and formulate coherent thoughts about it.
When evaluating this recently, I realized that the people who “made” me feel intellectually inferior all had one quality in common: They were not able to process, much less listen to, perspectives that varied from their own. This characteristic is a hinderance – how can we learn more about ourselves and others if we are not willing to listen to people who have differing perspectives?
I may not have been (nor currently am) the most mature human on the planet but I am genuinely interested in what other people have to say. Because another’s life experience cannot be the exact same as mine, they can bring a unique viewpoint to the table. Why wouldn’t I want to hear about it and consider it in my own decision-making, problem-solving or personal growth?
Simply put: The people who made me feel like I wasn’t smart enough were not able or willing to conceive that someone else would have a different viewpoint. Perhaps mine challenged and threatened them – I can’t say. I am certainly not going to locate them to ask because truthfully their opinions do not matter to me any longer. Realizing this made me see that I don't need to carry around that belief system any longer. It was one that was shoved upon me and I can choose to let it go.
Davis Made 
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